The Bubbha’s Frontporch

Just in case you somehow missed this, I thought I’d at least throw it up here. Didn’t really feel like posting anything tonight, so this is just a quick little something. I usually watch a little Nightline and then Kimmel before I drift off into dreamland. My real intentions here are to see if I can post a video or not. I haven’t tried it yet, but don’t think I’ll have a problem. This epic video premiered last night after the Oscars. I laughed my ass off. This video is in response to Sarah Silverman’s video, “I’m fucking Matt Damon.” I’m laughing at myself here, pretending to be relevant and cutting-edge. OK, let’s see if this works.

Well, I can get the video up, but it reformats my entire page. So I guess I need to spend more time on this.

Hell yeah!!!!

Damn. OK, I just wrote a huge post and then deleted it. Here’s a taste of it though: “I was able to involuntarily extricate myself from the situation due to my sans cranial insulation device condition.” It’s subject matter I want to avoid. It wasn’t about politics which is something else I wanted to avoid. It’s really hard to avoid politics though. Being something I pay particularly close attention too. It’s a genetic defect that was passed on from my father. It’s a mutation that doesn’t kill you till you’re in your 50’s, so you’re able to reproduce and thus pass the gene on to your decedents. Maybe it’ll end with me. My wife doesn’t have a lick of this affliction. But from observing the phenotype behavior, I would guess that it is a dominant gene.

An outbreak of the disease, unlike herpes, is on a pretty regular schedule. Once a week the light shines just a little bit brighter through my bedroom window. Sunday morning, Oh my precious Sunday morning, instead of sleeping in, I get up early in time to watch Tim Russert, Bob Scheffer, Chris Matthews, and George Stephan… Stephan-ah… Stephan-apolishrpuffnstuff. I’m a junky. Good thing I don’t have cable. It’s the only thing that keeps my addiction in check. And during football season..forget about it. I don’t even bother getting dressed.

Have you ever been watching a movie, enjoying yourself, and then notice something that bumps you for a moment. Something that for the sake of time or moving the story forward the director found it necessary to employ cinematic gloss overs. It only took a few minutes of deep thought on my part to come up with a few of these. A few of them I already had loaded in the chamber, but I decided to write this post after watching my most beloved “Lost” and seeing one of these tricks of the trade. They happen so fast or are such cliches that we, as movie consumers, don’t even notice anymore….unless you’re paying attention.

The instance of Lost in question was the scene where they are introducing the 5 rescuers, and the female paleontologist is in the desert at a dig site. She is confronted by a local official, who she then bribes. The bribe is instantaneous, he confronts her and she pulls out a large wad of cash from her front pocket and gives him the whole thing. Was that all her money? Didn’t she need to count some and save a bit for lunch?! Obviously, this was her bribe stash. So, I decided to write down a few more of these that I think are pretty funny.

How about the guys who are digging in the dirt with some shovels trying to find a lost artifact. One of them suddenly hits something and looks with surprise at his buddy. He taps the buried object a couple more times, smiles like a lunatic, and kneels down and dusts the millimeter of dirt remaining on top. Yeah, you were shoveling away and never hit the thing till all the dirt is shoveled off?

There’s never friendly-fire in war movies. Peons thugs get knocked out by a punch to the face. People never say “goodbye” or “see ya” when they get off the phone, they just hang up. No one ever, when they are on a journey, has to stop to take a dump. Did Gimli just poop in his dwarf pants? This one drive me crazy: the infinite Zoom-in for pictures. Think CSI where they ask, “Can you enhance that?” and then they keep Zooming-in till they ID the killer from the reflection in the eye of the victim from a crappy security cam video. I think Suburbia pulled something like that. Of course, I’d be remiss not to mention the all too familiar Wardrobe Montage. An entire day of shopping is whiddled down to 3 crappy outfits, 1 cool one, a few frowns from the best friend, a 3-way mirror, and maybe even a dog that groans and puts its paw over its face. Oh yeah, Walking on Sunshine has to be playing.

OK, one more. The guy on the run…he’s a fugitive from the law. Accused of a crime he didn’t commit. He’s finally able to get a little bit of rest in a dingy motel room. What’s he do…turns on the TV. No need to channel surf, the News is always on. And it’s always the beginning of a report of the fugitive on the run. As soon as the report is over he turns the TV off. IF he leaves it on, the next report will provide information that will help the man on the run catch the real killer.

Damn, if life were just that simple.

Too much sex and beer, I suppose… Good things. Not conducive for writing blogs, however. This winter is wearing me down too. Ride it out. Walk it off, son. Brush the dirt off and get back on that horse. So much to write about. I have some ideas for some permanent pages and have actually written some notes, but nothing tangible. Also been trying to find out about feeds so that the content will update itself, with links, and remain current. Oh yeah, one last thing. Networking. Probably should look into building or integrating into some kind of community. Once again…low energy. Think I’ll go to bed.

So, I guess I won’t write anything tonight because of the huge t-storm going on right now. I was gonna talk about the holiday vacation and how I didn’t have internet connection….oh well…next time.